Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Randomize
