She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Randomize
