Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
