I want to stick my p in your. b.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Randomize