have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
