she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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