dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
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