I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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