oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
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