Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
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