everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
it was like eating out sand paper
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We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
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