i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Randomize
