Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
