Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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