I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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