it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I'm at about main and main street
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
