Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Randomize
