Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
Randomize
