I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
Do vagina's smell?
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
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