We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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