I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Randomize