Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
