if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize