YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
