and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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