This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
how do you play pong handcuffed?
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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