Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Randomize
