I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
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