you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Randomize
