i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize