Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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