so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize
