If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize