You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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