Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
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Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
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Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
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