sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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