I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Randomize
