he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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