she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
I have post one night stand depression
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