Don't you send me to vm
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Randomize
