found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
My life is pants optional.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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