How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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