Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I lost the right to judge tonight
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Randomize