i may or may not be watching the land before time
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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