have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize