community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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