I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
