Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
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