you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
