Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
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