did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
